Or at least, either calm down or render it so I can’t feel you again….
Gah. For the last several days (almost a week) I’ve been able to feel my heart beating pretty much anytime I’m not focused on something specific/concentrating. Especially when I’m trying to get to sleep at night.
It’s not that (as far as I know) my heartbeat is currently abnormal. I think it’s a sensory issue having to do with interoception. (Check out Musings of an Aspie’s post defining interoception and detailing some of the things it involves.) But the basic definition is that interoception is the perception of things that are internal to your body – temperature, organ and muscle feelings, hunger, thirst, need to use the toilet, etc.
Normally/usually, I’m distantly aware of my heart beating; if I think about it, I can sometimes feel it. Or when it occasionally jumps/skips a beat or so. But over this period, I’ve been feeling it thumping. Or pounding, perhaps, as an alternative term, though I think “thumping” is a more accurate descriptor.
It’s rather troubling, interfering with my ability to sleep and raising my anxiety levels (because under “normal circumstances”, I wouldn’t be able to feel it like this, meaning my mind jumps to the conclusion that there’s a problem). It also seems to be reducing my ability to concentrate on other stuff.
Not sure how much anyone can help me cope with this, considering the whole “internal feels” element of the situation. But I thought I’d toss this out here, because it’s being an issue.
*shrugs* If anyone does have any suggestions or advice, please, let me know? It’s driving me nuts at the moment, and I’m really not sure how to cope.